Dear Father in Heaven – I have been ill all week. I haven’t done much. I’ve hardly eaten. I’ve not had any energy and therefore not been able to do much. I feel quite disheartened and deflated. I felt hurt … Continue reading →

In a very strange way this year I feel like I have gone through a lense, sort of like a tunnel revisiting the hospital room where I was cooped up for days prior to my son’s birth and the days … Continue reading →

For some five years is a long time. For others it’s a passing of time. A marker of time. A reality that no longer is a new reality but the reality of what God gave you for the time being. … Continue reading →

Sweet Baby Boy in heaven above, It’s been five years since you departed Father God sent you to me with much love Not knowing what pain it would cause I deal with it just because When you were inside of … Continue reading →

Dear Sebastian, It’s been five years almost to the last moments I felt you move. I can’t remember at what stage you last moved. Was it late evening on the 25th of September 2014 or in the early hours of … Continue reading →

It’s another year almost since your untimely death and I find myself screaming in my pillow. Screaming angry tears of regret. I wish to the heavens that you did not have to die Sebastian. I miss you so unbelievably much … Continue reading →

I’m recovering from a severe migraine attack. This last one lasted 48 hours in total. I remember going to work, vaguely remember that my colleague took me home. I had a blinding headache. I should not have dragged myself to … Continue reading →

Last week Thursday I came full circle on the Isle of Wight. I’ve lived here for a year now plus a few days. I didn’t think I was going to last on the island. I thought I’d leave. I thought … Continue reading →

Dear Mommy, I know how hard life has been for you in the last year, and how hard you’ve tried to fight through each battle, and through each storm. Believe it or not you’re doing better than you think you … Continue reading →