I’m recovering from a severe migraine attack. This last one lasted 48 hours in total. I remember going to work, vaguely remember that my colleague took me home. I had a blinding headache. I should not have dragged myself to work on Thursday but I did. Why would I do that?
My emotions are free fall. I feel extremely anxious and restless. I feel close to tears. It’s like a train hit me and I am recovering from the train wreck. I feel fragile. My body hurts. Every part of my body hurts. It’s like I’ve become old overnight. I’m very tired. My head still hurts. My voice sounds cracked. Doing stuff takes effort. My body is catching up.
Will these migraines ever stop? Or will I always suffer from them? I don’t ever want to experience pain like that again. It kills me. I wanted to die when the pain hit me. It’s a pain not worth living for. Dad’s gentle head massage on Thursday helped ease the pain if only temporarily. Mum’s gentle massage helped ease the pain on Friday. I felt small but safe. Loved. Valued. Cared for. Their presence giving me the peace and security I needed. It was different. Usually I’m left alone to my devices. But Dad and Mum were there. Patiently helping me and staying with me. For that I am grateful. I wasn’t alone.