A goal I set two years ago after my son died was to learn how to drive a car. It took two years to build up the courage and stamina to do something that millions of people do everyday. Getting behind the wheel. For me it was a difficult feat to accomplish. Scary. Slightly nervous… Wondering can I be like those people and become a component driver? It still remains to be seen. But at long last I took my first step to reach the goal of getting behind the wheel. Only this goal will be completed once i get a driving license after i complete the test and pass!
Yesterday I sat behind the wheel for the first time and drove up and down the parking lot a number of times mastering the art of breaking slowly and gently. Yikes.
Just like that: the instructor says get in front of the wheel. I ask: do you trust me to do this? There was no thinking twice allowed. Just going forward. Just like that I sat in front of the wheel. No second thoughts. No option to back out. Suddenly my legs felt like flubber and my stomach had a million butterflies in them swimming around.
I had to shift the seat right up to the steering wheel. I am short. Or rather very short. And then adjust the seat so I could see the road. Again my shortness was a bit of a disadvantage but somehow I succeeded.
Once I was sitting comfortably the instructor says start the engine. Wow what really? Are you sure its safe for me to do that? There was a few minutes silence before I gathered the courage to turn on the engine and it zoomed to life. The car started rolling. I wasn’t touching anything. Just the clutch gently.. Then the instructor says move your car between those two orange cones om either side. Heart in my throat i gently maneuvered my car between the two cones as if I was a pro!!! Ha! In the half twilight of autumn days – I drove the car occasionally pressing the gas and then shifted gear to second gear like instructed whilst every so often being told to break. A few times the engine stalled and I had to start again.
But here I was after 26 years sitting behind the wheel. At last. Amazing really. For some a scary thought. For me an accomplishment in itself. Driving a car has never interested me. However over the years I realize its an important skill to have so, I swallowed my fear and gained the courage to get in front of the wheel and drive the car around the parking lot on a bumpy road.
I was afraid of crashing the car but I didn’t. Which amazed me somewhat. Driving will probably be one of the most dangerous things I will ever do in my life and I pray for God’s angels to surround me as I step into the car!!
So let the sojourn begin. Onto the next driving lesson in 3 days time!