On 8th November 2014, about 6 weeks after my little boy died, I finally got to lay him to rest and have a memorial service.  I wrote this for him and read it out in front of a crying church.  Half the people i never met.  But they came to remember my son with me.

I gave birth to you beloved child of mine,
The pregnancy manual told me
9 months and you can come home
It did not say that
Birth could meet death
Nor did it say
That death would hold births hand.
—–
9 months of excited anticipation
Waiting upon your arrival
A hope unseen
A rainbow beyond the skies
Beckoning me to love
The little miracle inside
Of my womb, a bond stronger then
Wars could tear apart
—–
Precious little Sebastian
If you only knew how much mama loved you,
How everyone was waiting for your arrival in eager anticipation
Only to be told it was not to be.
—–
Instead I find myself writing
My final prayer to you baby son
—–
Something mama wants you to know:
Mama loved you so much
Mama misses you
Mama wanted to give you everything
Sebby thank you for choosing me to be your mama
Now I bid my farewell and
Put you safely in the arms of Jesus
—–
Goodbye my precious son
Till we see each other again