Rejection. What is rejection? According to the dictionary it means the action of spurning a person’s affection. Rejection is an awful emotion, one that can trap you into an endless cycle of negativity, and onto an endless treadmill of having no self-worth in yourself. From all the emotions that there are, rejection is probably one of the worst emotions that anyone can experience. Rejection cuts deep. It goes to the core. It wears you down, till the walls inside of you crumble completely. Till you no longer know who you are. Rejection is like cancer. It eats at you. It slowly takes over all your thought processes till you no longer know who you are in Father. That is what makes rejection so scary. But you have a choice:
- To believe what God says about you
- To believe the lies about what others say about you.
Your choice really. I suffered a long time from the feelings of rejection, and it is still a daily struggle where I don’t think that I am a lovable person. But by daily reading of the Bible, prayer, and replacing all the lies from what people have said, I am slowly healing from the deep wound that rejection causes, and becoming the woman God wanted me to be.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us,who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns?No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[a]
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[b] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
In the passage Romans 8.31-39 it clearly tells us that we are God’s people, and that nothing can separate us from who we are in Christ. So, if we are suffering from rejection we need to learn to replace the lies of the enemy with the truths from the Bible and know who we are in Christ Jesus.
Did you know that you can reject yourself by talking negatively about yourself. Such as:
I am not good enough, I have a big nose, I am unattractive. The list goes on. You can sometimes be your own worst enemy. A rejected person struggles to believe their self-worth in God. A rejected person struggles to see their potential, and struggles to believe that people care for them. A rejected person struggles to believe that they are loved. And when people say that they love that person. They have to know all the reasons why they are loved and why they are cared for, and then they still find it hard to believe, because all their lives they have been told that they are not worthy. A rejected person has a wounded spirit, and gets easily hurt by criticism that can be meant in a positive way. And the saddest thing of this all is that the person that feels rejected gets cheated out of what God wants them to do.
What causes rejection? Rejection can be caused by many factors such as divorce, rejection is your opinion of yourself, deep emotional hurt from the past, death of a lost loved one, childhood experiences (note: for a woman a father’s rejection is the worst thing that can happen to anyone). Replaying old messages in our mind. Our brain is like a recording machine. It records everything, and sometimes it is easier to believe the negative things about oneself over the positive things… Learn to switch off the messages of negativity, and learn to replace them with positive affirmations.
Seeking a parent’s approval is a sign that your basing your identity upon what your parents think of you. Seeking people’s approval is a sign that your basing your identity upon what others think of you. When what really matters is what God thinks of you!
There are three ways to create a healthy self-image:
- A sense of belonging
- A sense of worthiness
- A sense of competence
If you don’t have those views of yourself, you will go through life struggling to accept yourself, rejecting yourself, and believing that no-one likes you. You will miss Father’s best for you. God loves you!
We are children of God.
John 3.16 – For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
Christ’s death affirms your worth.
God loves you. Nothing can separate you from the love of God in Jesus Christ.
Competence – we can do anything God calls us to do.
Philippians 4.13 – I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me.
You have to remember that some people may reject you but that is because they have a problem. You are not the problem. Every single one of us is loved by Father.
You need to learn to face the root of your rejection so that you can be the person God wants you to be. It will eat at you like cancer till you deal with it, and replace the lies with the truth from the bible, with positive affirmations from people who believe in your potential, with Father’s love.
Ultimately you have a choice –
- Believe what God says about me
- I can choose to believe what others think about me.
Who do I want to trust? Who do you want to trust?
We all have a choice to make, if we want to move on from the feelings of rejection. You can make a decision based on what Father says about you. Note: if you have rejected someone and you are convicted of that, you will need to have the courage to ask them for forgiveness.
Lastly, people like Jesus were rejected. What is the ultimate rejection in life? The ultimate rejection in life is when we do not believe that the Lord Jesus is our saviour.
Dear Father, please help me to move on from rejection, help me to replace the lies of the enemy with positive truths from the bible. Help me to see my self-worth in you. Help me to heal from this deep wound for nothing can separate us. Lord help me to seek healing, and help me to be at peace in you. Amen.